Nobody's Perfect

“Usually the people who hurt people have been hurt themselves.  Hurt people hurt people.”

This girl is fun and lively, always has a sense of joy and brings her deep opinions and thoughts into life.  I am thankful she was willing to share life with me this past Friday.

What kind of oppression have you experienced in your life?

Just in high school I guess, when a person is more disabled, I have more compassion and sympathy for the people who are not getting treated right because they have gone through a lot themselves, so they can have more compassion to realize what it is that they need help with.

I found that I had more sympathy for the other people who were getting teased or mistreated- I would stick up for them.  Not necessarily just in high school but just in general in life situations if I see someone mistreating somebody then I right away jump in there and say, “Hey what are you doing? Why are you treating them that way or talking to them that way.  I think we should listen to them.”

Are them times that you have been the one who’s been the one who’s been mistreated?

Lots of times, yeah.  I am really shy and quiet and so I don’t say much.  I just kind of let them bully me or say what they want to say.  But if they are mistreating someone else like my friend or a classmate or whoever then I will stick up for that person.  But if they decide to pick on me or say rude comments, I usually just let it slide.

In your experience why did people pick on you?

Just because I am disabled so I’m slower or I talk different or I learn at a different speed then them or sometimes even because I am sticking up for another person.

How would you suggest someone redefine normal in order to overcome oppression?

I think that people shouldn’t use the word normal.  I’ve been told before that normal is a setting on a dryer and that’s the way I look at it.  No person is normal.  I look at those people who saying, “well act normal.”

What is normal?

Cause to me nobody is normal.  We act all in our different, unique ways.  I think when you go and judge somebody by saying “normal” that you should look at yourself and define what normal is for yourself and just think about the word normal- what you think it is.

What strengths do you think you have?

I think I have the strength of loving and accepting.

Knowing that you are loving and accepting, how does that change how you personally see yourself?

I’m not really sure how to word it.  I just always remember my grandma who I took care of in the care home.  I just look at her life and I guess I’m just like her: loving, accepting, and caring.  And whenever I go to think of a negative thought or a negative response to someone, I just think to myself:  Is that something my grandma would do?  I want to reflect as much of my grandma’s personality as I can.  To have her personality like I say I do, I have to live it out.  I can’t just say, “Oh yeah, I’m like my grandma” and then not act like that.  I have to live out what I say.

How do you wish people would listen to you more- what would you like to tell society in order to overcome oppression?

I guess really look at yourself and does that make you feel better to criticize other people?  Do you feel good about that?  How is that going to help the other person to become a better person?  How is that going to help them if you are putting them down?

Nobody is perfect so we have to stop looking for perfection.  Once people stop looking for perfection that will make the world a better place.